Go Beyond

The month of May is a bittersweet month for me. Four years ago, my beautiful mother spent her last birthday in the hospital. Little did we know as we wished her a Happy Birthday on May 19 that she would succumb to cancer before the end of the month. Dealing with her absence is still tough. At times, especially when I am alone, I am still easily overcome with grief. I miss my mother and everything about her ― her presence, the sound of her voice, her words of encouragement, her laughter and tears, and our weekly conversations. I treasure each and every memory that I have and give thanks daily for her influence in my life.

One of Mom’s wedding photos on display at our family home.

I am especially grateful for the love that my parents had for one another. As a kid I never doubted that my parents were deeply in love, and I do mean deeply in love. Their love for one another is perhaps the greatest gift they gave to me and my siblings. It was an anchor that made our home a safe and secure place. Four years after Mom’s death, Dad still visits her grave every morning. He has his quiet time on a bench at our family plot and makes sure that Mom’s grave is always adorned with pretty flowers. My Mom would not be surprised by this because she always knew how much Dad loved and cared for her.

In my mother’s arms in 1956.

This Mother’s Day, I miss my beautiful mother and am grateful beyond words for her. I could not have asked for a better or more devoted mother. I know how much she loved God and loved people. I want to continue to honor her memory by loving, caring for, and serving those in need. These are the things she encouraged me to do and that always warmed her heart. Although I will never get over her death, I am still learning to cope with her absence. And, that’s ok. That’s my new normal. And that’s what I’ll have to keep doing until I see her again.

Jonathan and Aubrey. Officially engaged!

This month is tough for me because of Mother’s Day, my mother’s birthday, and the anniversary of her death. But this month is also special because on May 23 we will celebrate my son Jonathan’s birthday. And, yesterday morning, Jonathan proposed to his best friend Aubrey Williams. We are thrilled at this news and are so happy that Aubrey will be a part of our family. We look forward to seeing them both later this month. Mom would have been so happy for Jonathan.

I am excited that Jonathan and I will get to spend the day together on his birthday because we have scheduled a training run on that day as we continue our preparations for the Texas Water Safari. That’s right! Jonathan wants to paddle the last 30+ miles of the race course on his birthday. We will be joined by several other TWS teams and plan on cooking steaks at Seadrift at the end of the day. This is a hard month for me emotionally, but I am grateful that God has blessed me with special memories of Mom, a son whose birthday we will celebrate this month, and the joy of welcoming Aubrey into our family.